Day 2

I realize that this blog is more of a form of self therpy and not "designed" for any audience other than myself and whoever stumbles across this. I am not trying to turn this into a cigarette quitting or drug rehab blog. Its about striving for excellence. There are plenty of ways that one can excel with addictions (E.G. Freud, Morrison, Van Gogh...) and there are plenty of ways to slack without addiction (e.g. chronic TV watchers). From now on, I will focus on commenting on methods/ideas i find useful in being satiated with life.

That being said, I still haven't smoked a cig since yesterday and have not drank or gotten high in a while. As of now, I will not keep posting silly updates like that - their boring, and don't really pertain to excellence. One can only thrive if one focuses on his or her positive practices. If you focus too hard on your abstinence from negative practices, you quickly abandon any hope of replacing those habits with a joyful existence. You would either wilt into an Eeyore like apathy, or collapse into some form or other of bad habits.

What did i learn today??? It takes a lot of concentration to do what you want to do. I may be unusually bad, but I have found it very difficult to keep focused on my tasks at hand steadily. I think I am avoiding something! I have a 100 page thesis due in 3 months that I really need to get cracking on, and don't know why i can't motivate myself to do it!!!

Avoidance is sooooo irrational. let's see... I guess I avoid it either because I fear that I will fail, am over-confident that i can do it last minute, and/or am just plain lazy. Probably a mixture of the three. If I fear failure, the only reasonable thing to do is work as hard and as best as I can on it till its done... If you give something your all, you can't fail in every sense (the most important one - i.e. you don't fail to grow). If i am so confident that I can do it last minute, then why don't I either get it done now and get it out of my way, so that i can move on towards other productive healthy activity, or do something else in the meantime before the last minute? Finally, If I am just plain lazy, why don't I just start now or give it up because its only making it harder by waiting? Obviously procrastination, avoidance, lazyness, over-confidence etc... are terribly irrational and counter productive. So, should we eliminate irrational things in general from our lifestyle? I don't think so. I know that irrational things are capable of motivating me to do counter-productive things. I want to know if they are capable of motivating me to do productive things. But what would a irrational productive habit look like? Tomorrow...